


The Long and Winding Road

by Dreamsofnever



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-25
Updated: 2016-08-03
Packaged: 2017-12-03 13:27:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 19,477
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/698769
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dreamsofnever/pseuds/Dreamsofnever
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>With Dean and Cas missing and Meg and Kevin taken prisoner by Crowley, Sam sets out to find out what happened to his brother and Cas and get the two of them back. Along the way, he runs into a dearly departed friend who might be able to help in rescuing Dean.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Return

**Author's Note:**

> My own AU take on Season 8.

__

_And still they lead me back_  
 _To the long, winding road_  
 _You left me standing here_  
 _A long, long time ago_  
 _The Long and Winding Road-The Beatles_

It had been months since the showdown with Dick. Months that Sam had spent chasing down every possibly lead on what might have happened to Dean and Cas. He knew that they needed to find a way to rescue Kevin too. He felt pangs of guilt whenever he thought about the prophet, who had simply been an innocent kid shoved into a crappy situation because of their actions. But when it came down to it, family came first. That was how it always was with the Winchesters.

First priority was to get Dean back and then they could figure out how to clean up the mess they'd made of Kevin's life.

It wasn't the first time that Sam had been left on his own. But that didn't mean that it was any easier this time around.

The search for a psychic that might be able to help find Dean and Cas had led Sam to New Orleans.

That was where he found her.

He'd just finished the first meeting with the psychic, a woman by the name of Destiny (of all things.) She'd given him enough of a picture to confirm his suspicions about exactly where Dean and Cas had ended up.

His head full of what he was up against, Sam had walked right by the alley and ignored the wild barking that he'd heard. A dog running wild wasn't even on his radar.

In fact, he kept walking until he heard a scream. It was only then that he drew his gun and darted down the alley.

He saw the blonde figure, crouched low, a weapon of some sort in her hand. The hair fell in a curtain over half her face, and she was covered in a layer of grime. She was twitchy, but there was a certain ferocity to her. Sam didn't take the time to study her and instead got between the dog and the woman.

It was only once he fired a shot off to the side of the alley that the dog turned tail and ran.

Only then did Sam hear a whimper and turn to check on the blonde.

He stared, not believing his eyes at first. He took a step toward her, hoping to get a better view. It was possible that all of these months on his own had him seeing things. Maybe. He supposed that it would make sense that in the absence of any allies to turn to, he might see more than a passing resemblance in a random encounter.

All the same, he took a step toward the woman.

"Jo?" his throat was raw, his voice carrying just a hint of hope that he wasn't wrong.

Her brown eyes raised to meet his and then shifted away.

"Black eyes," she muttered and tried to shrink back again, flattening herself against a nearby building wall.

\----

It had taken a lot of coaxing to get Jo to come back to the motel room with him. Sam had run through the usual routine-holy water, cutting himself with a silver knife, and he'd made her do the same thing. Jo hadn't said anything else, but she'd silently consented to going with him. He didn't know why she was back, but he couldn't just leave her to wander around the New Orleans streets.

It was only after she'd cleaned up and eaten something that Jo looked at him again. She looked like she was trying to figure something out, though Sam wasn't sure what. When she didn't voice whatever question she might have had, he took out his research again.

"I thought Hell would have more fire and brimstone."

Sam almost jumped at her voice and looked up from his research. So familiar and yet it still felt like an echo of a distant memory. It was gravelly, as though from lack of use. All the same, there was a slight smile on her lips when he met her eyes. The smile didn't quite reach her eyes, but he could still see a whisper of the strength that had always defined the Harvelle women in his mind.

"Jo, you're not in Hell. Trust me. I would know." He stood, but didn't approach her.

She stared at him and then rubbed at her arms.

"Hurts."

Sam nodded. He didn't know what had happened to her, but he knew coming back from the dead. He also suspected that she'd been in Heaven. Where else would she and Ellen have ended up really? And if she remembered Heaven and was now here... Well, he didn't want to think about what Earth might feel like after spending years in Heaven.

He went over to the sink and poured a glass of water, returning and setting it on the edge of the table closest to her. He sat down again.

"We're on Earth. I don't know how or why, Jo, but something brought you back. This isn't Hell. And it's not Heaven either. It's just... life."

Jo stared at him for awhile and then finally nodded and went back over to the window, peering out of it.

Sam sighed and paged through his notes again.

"Dean?"

This time she didn't look at him, but the question hung on the air all the same. Sam didn't answer right away and instead shuffled through his papers. He didn't know how long she'd been back and he didn't know what sort of mental state she was in.

He did know that she'd had feelings for Dean. That wasn't a secret. He also knew that right now, she was the only company he had. Maybe she couldn't help, but maybe he just needed someone to listen as he talked through it. And maybe she needed a straight answer to where Dean was.

"Dean and Cas have been missing for months. There was... well, we had a showdown with some pretty nasty creatures. You might say that we won, but things didn't go well. What we used to take out the head monster also sent Dean and Cas somewhere. I've been trying to find out what happened to them, and I'm pretty sure now that they're in purgatory."

Jo's head turned to him sharply, her eyes suddenly very lucid. Any hint of caginess was gone for the moment. In that moment, she reminded him of the way she'd been on the night before Carthage-full of life and determination and just a little bit of that 'give 'em Hell' attitude that they'd all needed when going up against the devil.

"Purgatory?" she repeated.

She took the seat at the table across from Sam, her expression grave.

"What else do you have on this?"


	2. Blood Sacrifices

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam and Jo get a lead on a ritual that might get Dean and Cas out of Purgatory.

The long and winding road  
That leads to your door  
Will never disappear  
I've seen that road before  
It always leads me here  
Lead me to your door.  
The Long and Winding Road-The Beatles

 

Being back was surreal for awhile. Jo still didn't know how she was alive, but there were days when it all just hurt. The air was too harsh, the sunlight too bright and the darkness too suffocating. She couldn't quite remember Heaven, but some mornings she'd wake up with the sense that she'd lost something huge.

Then there were the nightmares. She didn't remember much from them, save for the fact that she would always wake up screaming.

Sam seemed to understand, to some extent. He was usually there with a glass of water or some other sort of drink if she wanted it.

Theirs was a strange existence lately. They'd been traveling the country in search of a way to get someone out of purgatory. Sam was quieter than usual, though Jo couldn't blame him. She hadn't really seen the Winchester brothers without each other, but she knew how close they were. So she knew what it must be doing to Sam to have lost Dean a second time.

She was still sorting through her own feelings on everything. She knew that the idea of Dean being trapped in Purgatory made her ache. The last time she'd felt this way had been after his death. Bobby had refused to give too many details, but her mom had pulled out enough information for the two of them to do the math. At least this time, it hadn't been as a result of a choice he'd made.

Though somehow that didn't bring any comfort.

Jo still didn't know why she'd been brought back or what had decided that she should be returned to life, but she knew that there was always a price involved. Something like this didn't come with no strings attached.

If and when they found a way to bring Dean back to this Earth, she'd look into it as best as she could. She had to know what she was doing here.

\----

Jo could tell that Sam was starting to lose hope by the time they stopped to see a mystic in Las Vegas. It was their last lead and it was one of the leads that only seemed to have potential. The woman that they'd been referred to could just as likely be a fake. The chintzy decor in the tarot parlor certainly didn't inspire confidence. There was every cliche about fortune-telling in the waiting room.

The woman was an airy redhead with three-inch long gray roots. She talked with her hands as she led them into the room. Jo exchanged an exasperated glance with the younger Winchester. They were clearly wasting their time.

Sam gave a helpless shrug to indicate that they would have to at least stay long enough to be polite.

Once inside the room, the woman dropped the act. Suddenly her hands were still and voice was an octave lower.

"Devin said that you wanted to ask about Purgatory."

They both nodded. The seer, as she called herself, eyed them both very closely. Jo couldn't shake the feeling that somehow the woman was looking straight through her. She shifted positions uncomfortably.

"For most, I would warn that you're playing with things that you don't understand. And perhaps you are. But Devin wouldn't have sent you unless you know the stakes."

She held out a little notebook. Sam took it and opened it. Jo moved a little closer to peek at the scrawl on the pages.

"That's everything you need to put the wrongs right again. It won't be easy, and the price you pay might be more than you realize."

Yet again, the woman looked at each of them in turn.

"This is all assuming that you have access to the blood of one who has been to Heaven and one who has been to Hell, of course."

While it might have sounded like a throwaway comment, Jo couldn't shake the feeling that it was anything but. She carefully kept from looking at Sam, afraid that any look she shared with him would give away too much.

\----

As they'd looked into the ritual, Jo couldn't help but wonder if she'd been brought back to get Dean and Castiel out of Purgatory. She didn't know who or what might have intervened like that, but an angel and a human didn't belong there. It was possible that someone-or Someone-might have been trying to correct the balance.

Possible, but... why her?

She didn't have too long to wonder. Once they had the shopping list, she and Sam had gone on a hunt for the ingredients. Some were harder to find than others. Dragon's claw-actual dragon's claw-was one of the last items that they'd been able to track down.

Sam watched Jo carefully as they put together the ritual. The instructions had directed them to a deserted beach that appeared to have closer ties to the other side. Once there, Jo set to work, but she couldn't shake the feeling of being watched. Finally, she looked up at Sam.

"What?" she asked flatly.

She'd long since outgrown the idea of anyone trying to keep her from doing something to protect her. She wasn't in pigtails anymore and she didn't need a babysitter. But the look Sam was giving her was filled with concern.

"Are you sure about this? I could try to find another way. We still don't know what the price will be."

Jo straightened up and took a few steps closer, her jaw set in a stubborn line.

"I'm sure. You think I don't understand what I'm doing? After all these years?"

Sam at least had the decency to look abashed at that. He shook his head slowly. Jo could see the guilt creeping into his expression, and she knew that he was thinking of the last time she'd agreed to help the Winchesters out. She wanted to bring that up-wanted to tell him that she didn't blame either of them for it. That she was just happy she'd gotten the chance to go out doing something that she believed might save the world.

It didn't matter that it hadn't worked right then. What mattered was that Dean and Sam had always been the ones who were going to put an end to the apocalypse. It had started with them and it had ended with them. And she wasn't one bit sorry that she'd played her part in helping them get there.

It had been a hunter's death. A good death.

And now she was back and she didn't know what she was supposed to do beyond bringing Dean Winchester back from a place that sounded like it was at least as bad as Hell.

She didn't say any of that because now wasn't the time to open up that can of worms.

Sam seemed to be wrestling with himself. Jo could see a little hint of relief layered in with the guilt and concern. Finally, he nodded.

"Sorry," he mumbled, and then went back to work.

The two worked in silence until it was finished. Sam shot her one last look of uncertainty. Jo answered the unspoken question by flipping the notebook to the page where the incantation had been scrawled out. She pulled out the silver knife that she'd been carrying around lately. It wasn't her dad's-that was still lost in Carthage somewhere-but it would do the trick.

Sam joined her and they both pricked their fingers and bled over a candle. Then both started to chant in Latin.

An unearthly breeze blew by and all of the candles flickered and died. Jo fought the instinct to try to relight them in an effort to chase away the darkness that had descended. She couldn't see anything more than a few inches in front of her face.

And just as suddenly as it had come, the breeze was gone and the temperature rose a few degrees as the candles sprang back to life.

Two figures were in the circle with them. Both bodies were bent over-bloodied and nearly broken. Jo just barely recognized Dean and Cas. She took a few steps closer as Dean looked up. He locked eyes with her and then spotted Sam.

"No," his voice came out cracked and raw. "You can't be dead."

"Dean, we're not dead," Sam said quietly.

Jo stayed where she was as the two brothers neared each other. Dean looked from Sam to Jo, a disoriented look in his eyes.

"What is that?" he growled. "Tell whatever it is to stop wearing her face."

Beside him, Cas stirred and took in the scene. The angel looked different than Jo last remembered him. Wilder, almost feral. It was the first time that she truly appreciated just how much power was wrapped up in the angel who had been a friend to the brothers.

"It's her," he said in a voice that sounded like it hadn't been used for years. "We're all alive. Sam, we can't stay here. Now that you've created a doorway, more might try to follow."

Dean stared at Jo, but said no more. She wasn't sure what she'd been expecting from this reunion, but he almost looked angry as he watched her. She finally turned her back and started to help Sam take it all down.

She didn't look at Dean again until they were getting into the car. She thought that she saw tears glittering in his eyes, but he turned his head away as soon as he seemed to notice her gaze.

She didn't have much time to muse on that because as soon as Sam put the car in drive, there was a loud crash and the whole car shook as something landed on the roof. Jo strained to look out the window as whatever it was took off again, but all she saw was a giant shadow flapping its wings as it flew into the night.

"What was that?" Sam asked the question that was running through Jo's mind.

"We didn't sever the link in time. It has no name in any language you'd recognize."

Castiel's voice was hollow, though Jo thought she detected a hint of fear. Beside her in the back seat, the angel looked almost twitchy.

Sam sighed and caught Jo's eye in the rearview mirror. From the front seat, Dean was silent. What little Jo could see of his shoulders over the seat, he seemed to be shaking ever so slightly.

"We need to get you two inside somewhere. We can figure that out tomorrow."


	3. Let Me Know the Way

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Coming back from Purgatory isn't exactly easy.

The wild and windy night  
That the rain washed away  
Has left a pool of tears  
Crying for the day.  
Why leave me standing here?  
Let me know the way.  
-The Beatles

 

There'd been an uncomfortable silence in the car after the creature-whatever it had been-had made its appearance. The silence had only been broken once they all arrived at a small cabin in the middle of Montana. Sam mentioned something to her on the way in about the cabin belonging to Rufus once.

Jo looked around the tiny place, trying not to think of the crotchety old hunter who'd been a family friend. As much as Rufus could have friends, anyway. Sam had given her the updates on who'd passed away in the time that she'd been gone, and it had unfortunately been a string of familiar names. The blonde hunter was starting to feel like the Winchesters were her only remaining ties to this world.

Dean was still resolutely not looking at her as they filed into the cabin. Cas looked the three over for a moment.

"You should be safe here. It owes you its freedom. It won't come for you unless you pose a threat."

Without giving anyone a chance to respond, he blinked out of sight.

Dean's face twisted from confusion to anger. Jo thought that she might be seeing exactly what had allowed him to survive locked in a land filled with monsters.

"Cas!" he shouted, but nothing answered back. The angel was gone for now.

Sam looked from Jo to Dean, seeming to consider things.

"Maybe we should leave him alone for now. He might just need time."

Jo didn't miss the glare Dean gave, or the way his lips pulled back into a maudlin sort of smile.

"Time," he repeated, shaking his head.

He moved over to the kitchen as though he'd been here before. Jo supposed that he probably had. Maybe even not too long before he'd been sent to Purgatory since he fished a few beers out of the fridge.

"I should probably go out and get some food for us," Sam said quietly. He met Jo's eyes and then looked at Dean. "Do either of you two want to come?"

"You two stay. I'll go," Jo cut in. She thought that Dean needed time to adjust before going out in public and she didn't think she was the best one to stay with him. The grateful but regretful look that Sam threw her cemented it.

He tossed her the keys to the Impala, which Jo plucked out of the air. There was a little hint of the old Dean as his eyes followed the trajectory of the keys and then looked at Sam.

"You're going to let her take my baby?"

A small smile spread across Jo's face.

"We have to eat. Deal with it, princess."

It was almost on reflex, but she caught the faintest hint of a smile when he looked up and caught her eye. He looked away and it was gone quickly enough that she wondered if she'd been imagining things.

\----

Jo had taken her time grocery shopping, hoping to give the brothers time to talk. She'd returned to both drinking beers on the couch, which was as much a sign of any that things might get back to normal some day. Nobody was bleeding or crying after all.

Dinner was quiet, though there were a few times when she'd expected a joke or some sort of snarky comment.

Figuring out sleeping arrangements had been more interesting. The cabin only had two rooms. Not two bedrooms, but two rooms and a basement that looked like something out of an S&M fanatic's dreams. Jo had pushed the boys to take the back room, which had a camp bed and two bunks. She'd taken the couch in the living room, even though that meant less privacy. Right now she didn't care all that much and she wasn't going to have one of them sleeping on the floor in the living room just to let her take the back area.

Once both of the brothers had retired, Jo realized that she couldn't sleep. She'd been so focused on the goal of finding a way to bring Dean and Castiel back and now that was done and she wasn't sure what to do next. They'd hunt that creature that they'd released from Purgatory-it was their responsibility, after all. But after that? She didn't know. She didn't fit now that Sam had Dean back. And she'd been out of the game so long that it would take awhile to get the funds to go out on her own.

She finally got up from the couch and padded into the kitchen, the floor chilly against her bare feet. She rummaged in the fridge before finding the pie that she'd picked up to go with dinner. When she straightened up again to close the fridge door, she had to stop herself from dropping the pie and going for her knife. It took a moment for her defensive instincts to calm down enough for her to realize that it was just Dean standing there. There was a look on his face like a kid that had gotten caught with his hand in the cookie jar.

At least he was looking at her. She sighed and put the pie down on the counter before going to look for a knife to cut it with. She also came up with two forks and two plates. Once that was done, she cut herself off a sliver and then nudged the pie over to Dean.

"Can't sleep either?"

He still looked as if he expected to be attacked at any moment. She could tell that it was taking every ounce of his self-restraint to avoid looking over his shoulder. As it was, his eyes searched the darkest corners of the room as Jo took a seat at the counter with her pie.

"So I think that this is the one time when I could use the line 'did it hurt when you fell from Heaven?' and get away with it," he threw her a smirk that seemed a little too practiced, as though he was trying too hard to be normal.

She didn't call him on it. Instead, she gave him a lopsided smile of her own.

"Wouldn't work any better than the 'last night on Earth' speech."

At the memories of just how true that speech had been for her, they both looked away quickly. Jo cleared her throat.

"Sorry," she said quickly.

Dean finally joined her at the counter and carved himself a slice of pie.

"No, Jo. I'm sorry." His voice was rough and Jo did him the favor of ignoring the fact that his eyes were gleaming with unshed tears.

She didn't know what exactly he was apologizing for-maybe all of it-from the way he'd acted since she got back to the way she'd died. She didn't blame him for one bit of it.

"Don't be," she said softly.

He looked like he wanted to argue but then gave up. They both fell into silence for a few minutes, both pretending to be a little too focused on their pie.

"I still don't know for sure that I'm not dead. Actually dead, instead of..." Dean's voice broke the silence, but he looked away and shook his head slightly, as if he didn't want to finish the sentence. "Never mind," he said, looking angry with himself.

He looked up and caught her gaze. Jo still wasn't sure what to say or if she should just let him talk as much as he needed to.

"Jo, I'm sorry that you got mixed up in this."

He set his fork down and stood, turning his back on her. Jo didn't say anything and instead just watched him go.


	4. Leads Me to Your Door

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jo and the Winchesters go their separate ways for a little while, but it doesn't last for long.

_And still they lead me back_  
To the long, winding road  
You left me standing here  
A long, long time ago  
Don't leave me waiting here  
Lead me to your door.  
-The Beatles 

 

Jo didn't have much in the way of Earthly possessions. Being dead for a few years was a great way to declutter she supposed. It didn't take her long to pack the bag that she'd picked up on a supply run. In fact, she was just zipping everything in when Sam returned from a trip out to get food. Dean was currently somewhere out back, taking out his apparent frustrations on some firewood. Jo's expression must have looked guilty when Sam walked through the front door because the younger Winchester looked at her for a moment.

"Were you going to at least say goodbye?" he asked.

Jo appreciated the lack of accusation and argument in his tone. She nodded. There had been a distance between herself and Sam ever since some demon had ridden him straight to her doorstep. However, that had changed in the past few weeks. She felt some regret that she was about to leave him to put the pieces back together for Dean on his own. On the other hand, Jo was pretty sure that giving the two brothers space was the best thing right now.

"I was just waiting for you to get home," she said quietly.

Sam sighed and glanced around the small cabin.

"Does Dean know?"

Jo shook her head.

"Are you going to tell him?"

The blonde hesitated. She'd gone back and forth on this one in her head and there had been a lot of indecision in there. Finally, she exhaled.

"I think maybe it's best for both of you if I just go. Dean needs to get his head straight and me being here and being back from the dead is not helping."

An expression that she couldn't quite decipher darkened Sam's features. He didn't answer right away. Finally, Sam moved to pick up Jo's bag.

"You have a car?" he asked.

She shook her head slowly. Truthfully, she hadn't been sure what she was going to do for transportation at the moment. She'd thought wistfully of her truck, but that was probably long gone by now.

"I can take you to the bus station," Sam offered. "I just need to let Dean know that I'm going."

Sam slipped out the back door before Jo could stop him. She fiddled with the zipper on her bag and tried not to glance too many times in the direction that he'd exited. It was only once Sam returned that Jo realized that she'd been holding on to a bit of hope that Dean might be with him. The expression on Sam's face made it clear that he'd shared the news with Dean, which simply deflated Jo a bit more.

Not much was said on the trip to the bus station. It was only once they'd parked that Sam glanced over at Jo. He took out a burner phone and handed it to her.

"A few of my numbers are programmed into that. We still need to look into whatever it was that escaped from Purgatory. And besides, I don't think we should go years between seeing each other. Any of us."

Jo tried to force a smile at the unspoken inclusion of Dean in that statement. She never did know how to classify things with Dean. They weren't exactly friends, or more than friends, but they weren't nothing either. And now? Well, there was a reason that people weren't supposed to come back from the dead, she thought.

All the same, she leaned over and gave Sam a quick hug.

"I'll keep in touch. Thanks, Sam." Somehow, she tried to include thanks for everything that he'd done since she'd been brought back.

\----

Months passed in somewhat of a daze. Jo found that there weren't many people that she knew left alive. Hunters never did have a long shelf life and it seemed that she didn't know much else. There was an ex-boyfriend that she'd left behind in Minnesota, but she didn't think that he needed to hear from her. Not after all these years.

Instead, she headed south and stopped just before the Mexican border, in Arizona. She found a job there and even found a house going for dirt-cheap rent due to the fact that previous occupants kept getting run out of the place or turning up dead under mysterious circumstances.

All it took was a simple salt and burn to make the place livable again. Not that Jo would complain about the low rent or even the befuddlement from her landlord that a petite blonde had lasted longer than any of his previous tenants.

Jo kept her eye out for the creature that had flown away after Dean and Cas had escaped from Purgatory, but so far she had found little more than dead end leads. It was a little unnerving to have spent four months searching and have nothing to show for it.

She'd kept in touch with Sam, though she hadn't heard much from him in the past few weeks. She assumed that something was keeping the two brothers busy. What she wasn't expecting was to find Dean sitting at her bar one night at work. The bar was part of a Mexican restaurant that clearly catered to tourists, as evidenced by the garish pinatas, the Mexi-american offerings, and the uniform of brightly colored skirts and peasant tops that all of the waitstaff and bartenders were asked to wear.

Jo almost walked past the hunter who quietly took up a table on the side of the bar. It was only on her second pass that she spotted Dean, sitting there in his leather jacket as though it wasn't 90 degrees outside. Someone else had already served him a beer and a plate of tacos. Jo couldn't help but stare in shock for a minute. He looked different from the last time she'd seen him. There was still a haunted look in his eyes, but there was also life there again. He no longer looked as though he wasn't sure if this was some sort of Purgatory-induced nightmare.

And when he looked up and caught her looking, he winked.

Jo ducked behind the bar just long enough to ask her supervisor to let her off her shift fifteen minutes early. Since the bar was fairly empty, she got the okay and grabbed herself a beer before heading to Dean's table and sliding into one of the empty chairs.

"Of all the Mexican restaurants in all the towns in all the world..." she said with a small smile.

There was just a little bit of hesitation as she watched Dean for some sign that he was here with bad news, or any hints of the tension that had been there when he'd first gotten back.

"Yeah, well I heard that you have the best tacos this side of the border. And that the waitresses aren't bad either," he returned her smile, even if it didn't quite reach his eyes.

"Where's Sam?" Jo asked.

Dean's sad smile stayed in place.

"Sam's looking after someone that's our responsibility. But I came because we might have found a lead on that thing that hitched a ride with Cas and me."

He nudged the plate of chips her way and raised an eyebrow. Jo helped herself to a few while she let the news sink in.

"At this point, it's just a lead, but we thought you might want in on the search," Dean continued.

That was new, Jo thought. Before her death in Carthage, she'd never thought that Dean would willingly call her for help. Her mom, sure. But he'd made it awfully clear that he didn't think Jo was cut out for the job. Then again, she supposed that a lot had changed for both of them now.

"Thanks," she said. "I've been working a few different angles too, but so far nothing's panned out. Whatever it is, it knows how to hide."

A little flash of guilt crossed Dean's eyes.

"Yeah, well it probably doesn't want anything sending it back there."

He took a drink of beer and Jo mirrored the action, not sure what else to say. She wanted to offer some sort of compassion, but wasn't sure if calling attention to the time spent in Purgatory would just make things worse.

She finished off the last of the chips and took a healthy swig from her beer.

"My house is as secure as it can be. We should probably wait to hash out the details until we're behind those closed doors."

Dean grinned, but again his eyes didn't quite match the expression on his lips.

"Never thought I'd see the day when you'd invite me back to your place, Jo."

"Yeah, well don't get too excited. I doubt it's our last night on Earth," she teased lightly.

They both stood and finished their drinks. Jo had grown up around bars, so she didn't have a problem chugging a beer in a pinch. Dean looked for just a brief second as though there was something he wanted to say, but whatever it was, the moment passed.

It was only once they were safely inside Jo's place that either spoke again. She watched him pace the living room and entry area, his green eyes cataloging everything as though he were planning various exits and vantage points. Jo supposed that she did the same thing whenever she was in a new place.

"Can I get you something to drink?" she offered.

Dean stopped in his assessment of the place and looked at her, a little hint of surprise paired with a smile as he nodded.

"Yeah, that would be good."

A few drinks in, he'd filled her in on the details. Jo wasn't sure how much of a lead it was, but she was up to looking into it. She did wonder why he'd come all this way instead of simply calling to keep her updated, but she wasn't complaining about being included.

Dean spent a bit more time filling her in on the prophet that Sam was currently guarding, and a few of the other hunts that had occupied the past few months. Jo did the same and it was only when the conversation lulled that she finally got up the courage to say what had been on her mind since he'd appeared in the bar.

"I'm sorry I left without saying goodbye." Maybe he hadn't been bothered by it, or maybe it had been for the best, but she had spent the last few months wondering if she shouldn't have left like that.

There was a surprise to his expression and the drink froze halfway up to his lips before he finally seemed to decide to put it down and met her eyes.

"It's okay. I needed to get my head straight anyway." He raised an eyebrow at her. "I assume that coming back wasn't exactly a picnic for you either."

Jo paused and didn't answer right away. She shifted her gaze and focused on taking another drink from her glass. She was thankful that the alcohol had at least kicked in a little bit. This wasn't an easy topic to think about.

"I'm still just trying to figure out what brought me back and why."

That was easier to say than touching on the fact that everything hurt more in comparison to what she'd been ripped away from. She didn't remember much, but bits and pieces had started coming back to her in dreams and she couldn't get away from the feeling that she'd been ripped out of paradise.

"I know the feeling," Dean said.

Jo looked up, surprised to realize that he was probably one of-if not the only people on Earth who truly did know the feeling.

"Any ideas yet?" he asked.

Jo's expression darkened, and she weighed her answer carefully.

"Not as much as I'd like. I think I know what they looked like, but I haven't been able to find anything that looks like that in any of the lore."

She was starting to doubt that the faces she'd seen in her nightmares were even real, but she didn't want to get into that. Not with Dean, and not with anyone else. There was a stubborn feeling that she needed to figure it out on her own.

"Anyone working with you on it?" Dean grunted.

Jo couldn't help but frown a little bit.

"Funny thing about being dead for a few years. You tend to lose your contacts. But I'll figure it out eventually."

"Or you could let us help," Dean replied. There was a little flash of frustration in his eyes and for just a second, Jo thought of that first case. "Sam and I know a thing or two about coming back from the dead. You don't have to do this alone, Jo."

She sighed.

"You two have your plates full, and it wouldn't be the first time I've worked on something alone. Look, let's just get some sleep. We can follow your lead in the morning and we'll talk about what could bring me back from the dead after that."

She stood and deposited her now-empty glass in the sink. Dean followed suit and Jo almost ran straight into him when she turned from the sink. She bit her lip and took a step back, almost on instinct.

"Sorry," she muttered.

He reached her around her to set his glass down and ran a hand through his hair.

"Don't be. Look, I'm not here to play big brother, but something that's going around yanking people out of Heaven is kind of a priority. If we can help hunt the son of a bitch down, we will."

There was a little flash of hurt at how quick he was to hunt down whatever had brought her back. Jo dismissed it, realizing just how ridiculous it was considering that hunting the thing or things that had brought her back down was her priority too. All the same, she took another couple of steps back.

"I'm going to get some sleep. The guest room's at the end of the hall. There are extra towels in the closet in the bathroom."

She started to turn to head out of the room and Dean caught her arm and gave it a gentle tug to spin her back to face him. Jo stopped and looked up at him, her breath catching in her throat. He stared for a minute and then released her.

"I could always get a room somewhere if you want."

It wasn't what she'd been expecting, but Jo swallowed the odd lump that was forming in her throat and shook her head.

"Don't be stupid. I've got this whole house to myself. There's room. Save your stolen credit cards."

She kept her tone light and even offered a smile for the mention of the methods by which the Winchesters usually got by. There was no judgment, since she'd resorted to a few less than legal means of getting by on occasion herself.

Dean's arms dropped to his sides, his fists half-clenched as though he wasn't sure what to do with his hands.

"Thanks, Jo. Night."

Once again, there was the feeling that something was left unsaid, but Jo didn't know how to dig too much deeper. Instead, she turned on her heel and headed toward her bedroom.


	5. Nightmares

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jo doesn't sleep well since she was yanked out of Heaven and brought back to life. Dean has trouble sleeping since his return from purgatory.

Jo awoke with a start. It took a moment for her to register what had pulled her out of sleep, but then she heard it again. Somewhere in the house, someone was screaming. As the fog of sleep lifted further, she realized that Dean was screaming. She swore under her breath and reached for one of her guns. She also tucked a silver knife into the waistband of her pajama pants.

It didn't take long to make it down the hallway to the guest room. Jo didn't bother to knock and instead flung the door wide open, gun pointed into the room. She didn't have any expectations, beyond finding something. Instead, Dean sat straight up in bed, his eyes wild with panic as he fumbled for his own gun.

Jo lowered her weapon after one more glance around the room.

"You okay?" she asked, her voice softening.

Dean stared for a few more minutes, his hand resting on the weapon that he hadn't yet picked up. Finally, he nudged the gun away.

"Just fine," he said, his voice gravelly and unwelcoming. "Sorry I woke you up."

"Are you sure?" Jo asked, but she barely got the question out before he raised his hand.

"Just leave it, Jo. Get some sleep."

She took one last look at her houseguest and then let herself back out of the room, smarting just a bit at the brush off. Then again, what else would she expect besides the tough guy act when she seemed to have walked in on a nightmare? She wondered how Sam handled these sorts of things as she tucked herself into bed.

It took awhile to settle down and get to sleep but when she did, Jo fell back into her own old familiar nightmare.

It always started on a sunny day. That kind of warm and bright that was just comfortable enough as the sun kissed your cheeks. A light breeze danced through the air and the smells of all sorts of food filled her up with the kind of anticipation that had been reserved for her mom's picnic lunches. A tradition that had stopped after her dad passed away. A tradition that they'd picked right up again once they'd found each other again. Both her parents grinned at her. And then... the chanting started. At first, it was an easily ignored hum. It grew louder but no more understandable. It wasn't any language she'd ever heard. It stirred within her bones, the sense of wrongness filling her up. And then something tugged at her.

Her parents' faces went from happy to worried and then she was yanked backward.

It hurt. It always hurt. There was gasping for breath, air that was too cold, a stomach that was so empty it felt she'd never be filled again, and a sense of nausea rolling around in her.

"Jo." That voice didn't belong there. Nor did the warm breath inches from her ear.

"Jo, wake up."

She reached out in an attempt to bat it away and a hand caught hers. It was only then that Jo's eyes flew open. Another hand grabbed her free hand.

"You're safe."

It took another moment to realize that the green eyes locked onto hers, the voice, and the hands all belonged to Dean. He released her only once the recognition must have passed through her face.

"Didn't want you stabbing me in your sleep," he said with a little half-smile. "You okay?"

Jo looked at him, only starting to register that he was sitting in her bed, still shirtless from when he must have been sleeping. She struggled to get into a sitting position so he was no longer looking down at her, and tried not to think about the thin fabric of her tank top and how it probably didn't leave much to the imagination.

"Probably same as you," she said. She hadn't yet forgotten about his dismissal, nor did she have any more desire to discuss her nightmares than he did.

There was the faintest hint of an apologetic smile across his lips. As if he'd only just become aware of how close they were, he shifted a little further away so he was precariously perched on the edge of her bed. He shifted his gaze from hers.

"It should never have been you back in Carthage with those hell hounds." His voice cracked with emotion and Jo reached out to give him a light shove.

"Stop. I died for something I believed in. Isn't that what every hunter wants in the end?"

Dean made a practice of studying her headboard, still carefully avoiding her gaze. She watched as his jaw tightened.

"Still. It could have been an easier way. Those dogs were after me. I shouldn't have asked you and your mom to be there in the first place."

"As if you could have stopped me from helping you. That's the thing that you never got, Dean. It's not your job to keep everyone safe. Sometimes you need to let people choose their own risks. I made my choice and I never regretted it."

He didn't say anything, didn't turn. Jo leaned against the headboard and attempted to catch his eye.

"I was always going to end up a hunter. Whether you and Sam helped out on that first hunt or not. I would think that you, of all people, would understand why. Without you two, I probably would have died back in Ohio. We can play the 'what if' game all night, but that's not going to change the fact that I always made my own choices. You carry around a lot of crap that you shouldn't, you know that?"

Jo didn't know why, but those words got Dean's attention. He looked up and met her eyes and there was an intensity there that caught her off guard. A second later, he cleared his throat and looked away again. When he returned his gaze to hers, the intensity had softened.

"I'm glad you're back. I hate myself for it because I'm not glad that you got yanked out of Heaven, but it's good to have you back among the living all the same."

Some of Dean's reactions today and before made a lot more sense now. Jo's eyes were wide as she stared at him, trying to get her brain to actually work in reaction to all of this. Her brain didn't kick in, but her hand seemed to reach forward on its own and brushed against his cheek. He leaned in to the touch and then covered her hand with his.

That action spurred her on and she leaned forward and pressed her lips against his. Dean let out a little guffaw of surprise and then there was a flurry of hands and lips and tongues as his arms wrapped around her and pulled her closer.

She wouldn't admit that she'd imagine what this might feel like more than once or twice. She'd given up on that line of thinking sometime after "I'll call you." Hadn't she? Her hands tangled in Dean's hair and now it was her turn to pull him closer as she attempted to move both of them away from the edge of the bed and precarious danger of falling off. Maybe she hadn't, or maybe they'd just come back around to each other. She didn't much care now when she was barely remembering to breathe in between kisses that seemed more urgent than the need for oxygen right about now.

"Jo," Dean's voice was just barely above a growl as he put his hands on her shoulders and pulled away. "You don't want to do this. Not like this."

The sudden stop was almost like a slap to the face. Jo scooted backward and sat up against the headboard of the bed, pulling her knees up to her chest as she looked over at Dean.

"Still trying to tell me what I do and don't want or need," she said with a sigh and a shake of her head.

His expression looked almost apologetic before he seemed to set his jaw with resolve.

"I'm just saying, maybe we're both a little shaken up and maybe this isn't the time." He ran a hand through his hair, failing at smoothing down the ruffling that had occurred during the rush of kissing. "Believe me, I'm probably going to regret putting a stop to this in the morning."

Jo couldn't help but glare a bit. She didn't have much patience for people trying to protect her, but she also didn't have much patience for bullshit. If this was a brush-off, then she'd rather just get the truth. And if it was trying to guard her honor or whatever, then she had no tolerance for that either.

"That whole 'right place, right time' thing doesn't exist. You know that, right? We're hunters and we have no guarantees of tomorrow. You either grab onto something when you have the chance or maybe you didn't want it all that much."

Dean blinked and looked at her.

"Are you giving me the 'last night on Earth' speech?" There was a little touch of amusement in his voice.

Jo shook her head and brushed some of her own hair out of her face.

"No. I'm saying that it shouldn't be this difficult." She exhaled in frustration. "Never mind. Let's just table this and get some sleep."

Dean stared at her and closed and opened his mouth a few times, looking as though there was something-or perhaps more than one thing-that he wanted to say. Finally, he closed his mouth and nodded.

"All right. Night, Jo."

He let himself out before she had the chance to return the sentiment. Jo watched the door long after it shut and then burrowed into her pillow, her lips still tingling from the memory of those kisses even as a heavy confusion set in.


	6. Apologies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean's thoughts the morning after the kiss that didn't go as intended.

Dean didn't sleep all that much after he 'd left Jo's room the night before. It wasn't like he slept all that well on a good night. He supposed that at least he had a different reason to be distracted. That kiss was etched into his memory, his lips still aching for what they'd started. He got up and made it all the way to his bedroom door, talking himself out of it each time. The hurt on her face when he'd pulled away was what stopped him. He didn't want to be the reason she looked like that. Not ever. Inevitably, he put that look on the face of every woman that made the mistake of getting too close to him. And those were the best case scenarios. That right there was a pretty damn good reason why he'd never followed up on calling her when he said he would. At least, that's what he told himself now. 

He stopped pacing long enough to punch the overstuffed pillow on the bed. Jo had already been a 'worst case scenario' too. That image of her dying on the floor of some deserted hardware store was always going to be seared into his brain. It was still a jolt to see her living and breathing and just as gorgeous as ever. Seeing her as a ghost had been different. She'd still been pretty, but she'd just been a shadow of her living self. It had been easy to remember that she was supposed to be dead. Now, he couldn't erase the memories of her dying, but he also couldn't find a way to rectify that with how full of life she was now. She was back to being a force of nature-a hell on wheels Harvelle. Even, or maybe especially, when she was kicking him out of her room in the middle of the night. 

At some point just before the first slivers of dawn started peeking through the curtains of the guest room, Dean managed to fall asleep. He didn't know how long he was out, but he woke up to the sound of pots and pans banging around in the kitchen. He gave himself enough time to wake up and pull on some clothes. At least it didn't take him long to get passed the bleary-eyed half-awake stage that most people had to contend with. Years of needing to get up and go at a moment's notice had chased that off. 

He took a deep breath when he got to the door. He wasn't sure what he was going to find downstairs. Maybe a pissed off Jo, which was not something that he ever wanted to be on the wrong end of. 

"Time to face the music," he muttered to himself and then headed downstairs. 

What he wasn't expecting to find was breakfast. Jo was just finishing up omelets, which she slid onto plates for each of them. She barely looked up as he entered the kitchen. He studied her, a little confused. 

"Morning, princess," she greeted him with a smile, and then set both plates at the table. 

"Morning," he replied, doing his best not to scowl. He didn't like the feeling that she was just lulling him in and eventually the other shoe would drop. "What's this?" 

She gave him a slightly amused look. "Protein. I figure that if we're going to spend the day looking into things, we might as well eat up. Just don't get used to it. I'm not running a bed and breakfast here." 

One of the things Dean had always liked about Jo was that she wasn't exactly high drama. She didn't feel the need to talk things to death, and they had a pretty easy back and forth when they actually worked together. This was different, though. He didn't like the feeling that there was something that she wasn't saying. Or that she might have been less phased by the previous night than he was. 

"Yes ma'am," he gave her a sarcastic salute and then dug in. A relatively comfortable silence settled over the room as they both ate. Dean didn't like talking during breakfast anyway, and he had to admit that this was probably the best one he'd had since he came back from Purgatory. Since before then, really, but his life was so divided that the time before Purgatory felt almost disconnected to the person he was after what he'd been through in there. It was funny, but having Jo around sort of helped combat that. He felt a little more like the guy he'd been before that, and before he'd lost the Harvelles in Carthage, and all of the other losses that came afterward. There was even a little glimpse every now and then of what it had felt like before he'd made the deal that ended in going to Hell and being responsible for the apocalypse. 

He didn't deserve that feeling, and he knew it. It didn't make it any easier to brush off the need to cling to it for as long as she'd let him stick around. Or at least until Sammy found Kevin and needed him back. 

Dean didn't realize that he'd stood when Jo stood until he followed her over to the sink. She whirled around and it was only then that he realized how closely he'd been following. He almost collided with her, but managed to keep it steady. 

"I thought I told you that you at least needed to buy me dinner first if you were going to ride me this close." The old joke brought a smile to her lips. Under ordinary circumstances, he would have smirked and tossed a smartass comment back. But these weren't ordinary circumstances. He really didn't get her right now. 

He stared down at her, and she stared right back. It felt a little like a game of chicken, and he was painfully aware of just how close she was right now. They were only a few breaths away from her hands sliding around him yet again and he spent much too long trying to figure out how exactly to get that moment back, even if he knew that he shouldn't. Finally, he held out a hand for her plate. 

"I don't know about you, but I don't let someone who cooks me breakfast do the dishes. Come on, hand it over." 

He wasn't a domestic guy and dishes weren't something he usually had to contend with on the road, but he knew how to do them and he knew at least enough to know that he wasn't going to let the woman who'd cooked him breakfast do all the clean-up too. Not that he wanted that spreading too far, but he could be a little more evolved when he cared about someone. He felt a smug sort of satisfaction when the smile that she'd kept on her face most of the morning gave way to at least some of the confusion he'd been feeling. She handed over her plate and then moved the frying pan and spatula over to the side of the sink and then she moved to grab a notebook and folder that he could only assume held her case notes. He didn't look at her, but cleared his throat. 

"Uh. Sorry about last night." 

He heard her stop moving, and could almost feel her turn and stare at the back of his head. 

"What exactly are you sorry about?" 

He grimaced. She couldn't just make this easy, could she? He finished up the dish that he'd been washing and put it in the dish drain. Then he glanced over his shoulder. 

"I don't know, Jo. What do you want me to be sorry about? That I was a dick to you when you checked on me, or that I burst into your room without knocking. Maybe that I really wanted to take advantage of the fact that you were shaken up." 

"Did I say that you had to be sorry?" Jo asked, and he didn't really know why, but now she just looked pissed. Oh, he'd been right about not wanting to be on this end of her temper. 

He exhaled heavily. He really didn't know what she wanted from him. He shook his head. 

"No. I just figured... You know what? Forget I said anything." 

He turned his attention back to the dishes, scrubbing a whole lot harder in his frustration. 

"Dean, I wasn't angry. I'm a big girl, you know. I actually do know what I'm doing, even when I'm shaken up. I was the one who kissed you, and you weren't interested. So no one needs to be sorry and we move on." 

Not interested? She got that from... Dean didn't turn around right away. He bit back a scathing remark about the fact that it had taken two to kiss. He also stopped himself from pointing out that if he hadn't been that interested, he wouldn't have worried about whether or not he should sleep with her. He didn't think that he had a right to say any of those things, because she was better off. He took a lot longer washing the last dish than he needed to, casting around for the right words. They didn't come, but he finally had to turn around anyway. 

Jo was at the table, engrossed in the contents of the file. Yet again, he didn't really know what to make of the rapid change or of her acting like they hadn't just been on the verge of shouting at each other. He studied her for a minute, still not sure what he was supposed to do here. Was he supposed to say something? Or just let it be? It wasn't like bringing up the subject had gone all that well in the first place, so he pushed aside anything else that he wanted to say and took a seat at the table. 

"So what do you know so far?"

She paused, her hand hovering over one of the papers in the file before she looked up and nudged it over to him. He wasn't sure if that was disappointment or hurt, or maybe even relief in her expression. Maybe a little bit of each. Whatever the case, she didn't say anything more about the outburst. Instead, she pointed out one of the newspaper clippings in the article. 

"There. That's about an hour from here, and some of those deaths look a little strange to me. They don't quite match up with anything I've seen before, so I'm thinking it's worth a look." 

This was easier to focus on than he might have thought. He'd always said that Jo could put together a damn good case file. It seemed that some things didn't ever change. There was even a little bit of a proud smile as he looked over the clippings and her notes. He finished reading through everything and looked up at her. 

"All right. I'm ready to go when you are." 

She smiled again. It was a little more strained than her usual smile, but he was glad to see it all again. He suddenly realized that it felt like a nice change of pace to be working this case with her. Sure, he'd always prefer working with Sam, but he had to admit that the scenery was nicer. And something about Jo made him feel a lot more human than he'd felt in the months since he'd come back. He also appreciated how easily they slid from the tense conversation into this. There were probably things that needed to be said, but they could wait. For now, he was almost looking forward to hunting down the son of a bitch that had escaped from Purgatory when he did. He felt responsible for that and was eager to send it back to where it belonged. Whatever it was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promise that I haven't abandoned this story. Life has just been crazy. However, I plan to get the next chapter up in the next week or two and get back to a regular posting schedule. If you're still reading this, thanks for sticking with me!


	7. He Never Came Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jo and Dean continue to look into some of the mysterious deaths in the area, hot on the trail of the creature that escaped from Purgatory.

_But maybe tomorrow_  
 _you'll wake up to find out_  
 _If I'm not good enough for now_  
 _I'm good enough to wait for you_  
-Good Enough, 8 Stops 7 

Jo clearly had access to at least some of her old hunting contacts. Dean was surprised when she produced a pretty damn good fake badge for their investigation. It made things easier, to be certain. He did his fair share as they asked their questions around town, but he had to marvel a little bit at how good she was at this. Sam had always been good with people too. He'd had those puppy dog eyes that made people trust him, made them want to tell him things that they ordinarily wouldn't share with strangers. Jo had a way of getting people to open up too. She had an empathy that hadn't been dulled by the few years she'd spent hunting before her death or by coming back from the dead. She was also just petite enough to seem harmless, even when wielding a badge. That wasn't to say that he agreed with that assessment these days, but he could see why people would underestimate her. He certainly had.

The more they found out, the more questions he had. The victim in question was a college professor. There'd been a lot of whispers about his affairs with students, and Jo had even managed to seek out one of the students in question. The woman had admitted to the affair, but had seemed positively distraught about the professor's death. Which didn't rule out some of the other women that he'd supposedly had affairs with. He wasn't married, so there was no wife in the picture to blame. Never mind that whatever this was wasn't human. The lower half of his body had been literally burnt off. It was a hell of a way to go and Dean couldn't help but grimace a little as they looked over the crime scene photos.

The entire day was also filled with the same dance that they'd started this morning. Dean was almost painfully aware of where Jo was in proximity to him. Each time she came close enough to touch, he had to wonder if she was doing that on purpose. Even if she seemed oblivious. He'd screwed things up all right, but that was for the best. Wasn't it?

They'd just returned to the station to question the local sheriff on a few more things when Dean's phone rang. Specifically, when he recognized Sam's ringtone. He looked over at Jo and the Sheriff.

"Sorry. I need to take this."

Jo smiled up at him and nodded. He thought he caught a hint of understanding in her eyes, so he figured that she probably knew who was on the other end.

"That's fine. I can finish up here."

The Sheriff-a guy who called himself Woody, of all things, didn't seem to broken up about Dean stepping out. Yeah, the oldest Winchester hadn't missed the googly eyes the Sheriff had been giving Jo when they'd first talked to him or now. He looked between the two and almost considered staying and checking his messages afterward. Which was stupid, he knew that. Finally, he exhaled and stepped outside.

"Sammy?" he asked as he answered the phone. He could still see Jo and the sheriff through the window on his office door and he watched as she laughed at some joke or other and touched his wrist. He grimaced and turned away.

"Dean, I found Kevin," Sam said. "He's okay, but he wants to go see his mom."

"Of course he does," Dean said, suddenly very tired. "Okay, where are you? We're finishing up here and I'll meet you somewhere in the middle."

Dean heard the office door open and shut behind him and saw Jo in his peripheral vision. She nodded to him and they both started toward the car. Sam filled him in on their location and they figured out a motel to meet at that would be somewhere in the middle of where they each were and where they needed to go, assuming that they couldn't talk Kevin out of exposing himself by going back home.

He hung up the phone once they got themselves settled in the car and he could feel Jo's eyes on him, questioning. He looked over at her and considered his options.

"If I leave, you're going to keep digging on this, aren't you?"

Jo gave him a hard look and nodded.

"I'm a little old for this 'sit at the kiddie table' shit, Dean. Go ahead and meet Sam. I'll keep digging on my end and I'll tell you if I come up with anything."

He resisted the urge to let out a growl of frustration. He still didn't know what the hell the thing that they were tracking was, but he knew that he didn't want her going after it alone. He'd lost her once, and didn't she realize that he didn't want to repeat that experience?

"Or you could come with me. Sam and I have been looking for this kid Kevin-he's a prophet, and Crowley got his hooks in him. Sam just found him and we could use an extra set of hands to keep him safe. Besides, we can discuss what you already know and try to work through this on the way."

There was a moment of silence as Jo watched him and he thought he could see the internal arguments reflected in her expression.

"Jo. Please," he added, his voice gravelly.

That word seemed to cease whatever hesitation she had. She even gave him a smile.

"Well, I suppose I can't let you and Sam have all the fun."

Jo spent most of the drive shuffling through the case file that she'd put together. Dean still didn't know how or why the deaths might fit together, except for the fact that they were damn weird and all within relatively the same area. There was the eating contest champ who seemed to have been blown up from the inside, yet they couldn't find the cause of that. There was the executive who'd had his hands removed and then had been strangled with his expensive tie. Then there was the teenage stoner who'd gone to sleep and never woken up, with no medical reason.

Four deaths, and besides them all being weird, Dean didn't see the connection. But Jo seemed to have a gut feeling that something was tying them together and he figured that he owed it to her to trust her judgment on this. He'd spent years underestimating her, right up until she'd put herself between him and those hellhounds and faced down death for him.

Jo shuffled through the papers once more.

"Four," she murmured. Then she paused and looked at them once more and then glanced over at Dean. "This is probably a long shot, but what if we're looking at this all wrong? They don't know each other, they're not in the same town. But what if the link has nothing to do with that? What if it's a set."

"A set?" Dean asked, frowning over at her as he turned onto the exit ramp.

"We have lust, gluttony, greed, and sloth. Do you know of anything that might go after people guilty of the seven deadly sins? Is that a thing?"

Dean grunted, trying to remember if he'd seen anything in his dad's journal about that. Not that dad's journal was the be-all, end-all, but even now he still was amazed at how many answers he'd found in there. Bobby would have known, though he dismissed that thought and the stab of pain that came with it.

"I don't know. Could be. And if it's that thing that followed me out of purgatory, there's a chance that it's something no one's seen for who knows how long."

Or there was a chance that this was the first time the creature had ever gotten out of purgatory. He didn't like the implications that they could be dealing with something that had no lore or history to back it up, but whatever the case they would find a way to end it. Dean didn't want anyone else dying just because Jo and Sam had saved him.

He checked in-two rooms, even if his first instinct was to stick together. Truthfully, there was a part of him that didn't want to let her out of his sight at all. Especially since they still didn't know what had brought her back or why.

Once he returned from the front desk and handed Jo her key, he noted the faint look of disappointment on her face. It was gone as quickly as it had appeared, so he figured that he was just imagining things.

"Well, good night Dean. Come get me when Sam gets here, okay?" Jo gave him a small smile and then turned her back. It was only then that Dean realized how much he didn't want to let her go.

"It's not that I wasn't interested," he blurted out. He winced. That wasn't something that he'd meant to say out loud.

Jo turned around and stared up at him, obviously confused. "What?"

Maybe he could have just dismissed it, said it was nothing. He probably should have. No, make that definitely. He definitely should have. And yet, he kept talking.

"It wasn't a lack of interest. Jo, I'd gladly take whatever you were willing to give me. But that's the problem. I'd take and I'd take and eventually you'd end up broken or worse. I don't have anything to offer you or anyone else anymore. I'm not that guy who walked into the Roadhouse all those years ago and... you deserve better. You always did."

Jo didn't say anything right away. She just stared, and the silence was almost excruciating. His first instinct was to just excuse himself and go in his room and close the door. Even months after his return to Purgatory, he still wasn't exactly used to human interactions. Especially not something like this. Finally, she took a step closer.

"It was never your job to decide what I deserved," she said softly. Her brown eyes studied his face and he wasn't sure exactly what he saw there, but it was uncomfortably close to sympathy and understanding. "There's a part of you that didn't come back from Purgatory, isn't there?"

Dean let out a harsh laugh. "There's a part of me that didn't come back from a lot of places, Jo."

She was still in motion, still getting dangerously close. He barely heard the sound of a car pulling up and two doors opening and closing. In fact, he didn't hear anything until Jo shifted her attention away at the sound of a throat clearing somewhere nearby. Dean looked over to see Sam and a weary-looking Kevin standing near a car. Sam at least looked somewhat apologetic and like maybe he was jumping to conclusions that he shouldn't. Jo looked between the three and offered her hand to Kevin.

"Hi, I'm Jo. You must be Kevin." Then she tilted her head toward the motel and looked between the three of them. "And we should probably get inside and talk some things over."

Dean wasn't sure whether to be disappointed or relieved, but it didn't matter really. Jo was right and they did have a lot to talk over. Feeling more lost than ever, he led the way inside for the others. They had a prophet's safety to arrange and a monster to track down. There really was no rest for the wicked, he thought to himself.


	8. Revelations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam has something that he thinks Jo needs to know.

Jo wasn't sure what she would have pictured in a prophet, but Kevin wasn't it. He was just a kid. A scared, even twitchy kid. It wasn't fair. Jo had chosen this life-as much as any child of a hunter could choose, anyway. She'd always gotten the feeling that there hadn't really been any other choice for Dean and Sam and she understood now that that was part of the reason why Dean had been so quick to discourage her. But Kevin... Kevin was knee-deep in all of this and nothing was going to make him stop being a prophet. It didn't seem right, but life was very rarely fair she supposed. 

From what she could gather, the Winchesters had found Kevin and his girlfriend had been killed in the process. They were trying to keep him safe, but he'd run off again while Dean was traveling down to see her. He hadn't said anything, but that wasn't exactly unusual. It sounded like Sam had looked and found the kid, for whatever it was worth. Now Kevin was insisting on seeing his mom. Not that she could blame him. 

Eventually, she'd excused herself to let the three sleep. She'd be there in the morning to help watch their backs as they escorted Kevin to see his mom. At least Dean had finally relented and allowed that. 

She didn't get to sleep right away. Instead, she took out the case file on the creature that had escaped from Purgatory and combed over the deaths once more. Maybe she was right about the Seven Deadly Sins, or maybe she was missing some other link. She wasn't too eager to sleep. She very rarely was these days. A knock on her door interrupted her train of thought. She looked up and felt a little surge of hope. There'd been a moment there before Sam showed up when she thought that maybe-just maybe-she could get through to Dean. At the very least, she'd started to understand him a little bit more. The trouble was, she didn't know if understanding would do her any good. He'd convinced himself that he deserved the solitary life and she wasn't sure if there was anything she could do to convince him otherwise. Unless... she had half a minute's worth of hope before she opened the door to reveal Sam. It wasn't that she was disappointed to see him, but he wasn't the person she'd been hoping for. 

If Sam noticed the disappointment in her expression, he was polite enough not to call attention to it. Instead, he gave her a small smile. 

"Mind if I come in?" 

Jo nodded and stepped aside to let him cross the threshold. 

"How have you been?" Sam asked once he was inside. 

"Not too bad," she said, content to stick to small talk as long as he was. 

"Did things go okay with Dean?" 

She looked at him, wondering just how much he'd picked up on when he'd first gotten there. It took her a moment to realize that he just meant the investigation. 

"We didn't learn as much as I would have liked, but I think I found a connection between the deaths. Right now it's just a hunch, but..." she shrugged. "I was hoping that if we worked together, we could figure out the creature and send it back where it came from." 

"That's the plan," Sam said. "Though that's not exactly what I was asking. Was Dean-" he stopped, cutting himself short and shaking his head slowly, as if considering his words carefully and dismissing a few options. "He hasn't been the same since he came back. Understandably so, but I was hoping that seeing you would be good for him. It was his idea. Once we came up with that lead, he wanted to be the one to go while I stayed with Kevin." 

Jo's eyebrows raised in surprise. 

"It was?" 

Sam nodded. 

"He hasn't said it, but I think he feels bad about how he acted towards you when he first came back." 

"He shouldn't. Coming back from the dead is more than a little disorienting. I'd imagine it was hard to have someone there who was supposed to be dead. I get it. Tell him that, if you can." 

"You should tell him." Sam looked at her. "Jo, Dean and I have both lost so many people. Getting you back is a little ray of hope. I don't know if he knows how to do that anymore, but don't give up on him, okay? I think he needs you a lot more than he realizes. Jo, there's something that I think you should know." 

He filled her in on their encounter with Osiris. On the trial, on the fact that she'd been the one Osiris had sent to carry out Dean's sentence. Sam didn't know exactly what had happened in that room, he'd had some guesses and Jo wasn't sure what to do with any of them. She was also a mixture of angry at being used and disturbed that she didn't remember that. Then again, she didn't remember much about her time being dead aside from a few memories of Heaven that had come to her in dreams. Mostly what remained was just the feeling of what she'd lost. She was still glad to be alive and glad for however long this second chance would last, but that didn't mean that she could entirely forget the feeling that she'd been completely at peace before. 

"Jo, I want you to stay with us. Please. At least until we can figure out the thing that escaped from Purgatory and find out why you're back. I know that Dean's been a little... intense lately, but please." 

Jo hesitated and just stared at Sam. It was a little strange to think that she would have jumped at this request back when she'd first gotten into hunting. Now, she just wasn't sure that Sam was right. If he was, she'd do what she could. But if he wasn't? Well, she supposed that it wasn't like she had much of a life to go back to right now. She could always start over again if she tried and it didn't work. And besides, the Winchesters still had access to a lot of resources that she'd lost in her time off this Earth. And she couldn't think of anyone better to hunt with.

Finally, she nodded slowly. 

"I'll stay with you both for as long as he lets me." 

Sam flashed a rare smile of relief. It struck her then how much less the two smiled than they used to. That alone made Jo certain of her choice. 

"That's all I can ask, Jo. Thanks." 

He stood as if to go and then seemed to think better of it and pulled her into a quick hug. Jo returned the hug and just hoped that he was right about all this.


	9. Momentus Interruptus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> On her first night in the Bunker, Jo finds that she's not the only insomniac.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I took as long as I did on this chapter because I was agonizing about how to handle the Men of Letters/Henry Winchester plot and finally decided that the meeting with Henry went pretty much exactly as in the show.

Jo kept her promise to Sam and stuck with the boys. Even after Kevin went off and asked them not to follow him. She knew that it meant losing her job and the house rental that she'd secured for herself, but this felt more important. She left them briefly from time to time when they got leads on the creature that had followed Dean and Cas out of hell. There were a lot of dead ends and it sometimes helped to split up. She was frustrated at the lack of answers and Dean was growing increasingly more ornery about the fact that they couldn't get in touch with Cas. Dean seemed convinced that Cas knew more about the creature that seemed to be feeding on people who were living examples of the seven deadly sins. For whatever that was worth.

While she was gone tying up loose ends and moving the rest of her things out of the rental house, Dean and Sam's grandfather came from the past and left them something of a legacy. Jo was definitely curious about the Men of Letters when Sam recounted the story of everything that had happened to Henry and everything they'd found. She was also pretty amazed at the space that they'd inherited. 

Her first night in the bunker was a restless one. Jo was getting used to the nightmares, but there were some nights when it was harder to get back to sleep than others. The change of scenery didn't really matter either way-she could sleep anywhere. But it didn't help matters that this place was still a mystery to be explored. The library alone held more books on the supernatural than she'd ever seen in her life. Let alone the sheer size of this place and how many corners had been left untouched so far. But first, Jo made her way into the kitchen. She'd made a point of stocking it with beer and food, since they seemed to be holed up in here until they could find more answers on the thing that had escaped Purgatory. 

She stopped once she got into the little den off the library. The light was already on and she wasn't alone. When Dean didn't turn around immediately, she considered just slipping away and finding somewhere else to drink the six pack that she'd retrieved from the fridge. Too late, he turned and gave her a small smile. 

"Hey." 

He gestured toward the armchair opposite his. Jo took the seat, still not sure what to say here. Dean hadn't tried to send her away, though he hadn't always seemed happy about her presence either. Actually, there were times when he simply didn't seem happy period. Though Jo supposed that she couldn't blame him. 

"Guess I'm not the only insomniac around here," Jo said, returning the smile with a cautious one of her own. 

"Yeah." Dean frowned and looked down at his drink. "You get moved out of your place okay?" 

Thank god for small talk, Jo thought. They hadn't actually been alone together since the day after that rejected kiss. That was partly her doing and, she thought, partly his own avoidance of her. It was probably better that way, though she hoped that they'd eventually get to a point where things weren't awkward. Could she do that? Could she ignore her feelings for him and just be platonic? She thought she could. Especially if she was sure that sticking around was best for him. 

"There wasn't much to move, so yeah. You know hunters. It pays to travel light." 

She'd had a few things to sell off or donate, but mostly it had been just a quick stop to put in her official notice and grab a few weapons she'd left behind. It was a little bittersweet, but she'd spent enough time on the road that she didn't get overly attached to places. People, though... Getting attached to people had always been her downfall. Even when she was working at the Roadhouse, it had been hard to have certain people coming and going all the time. Or worse, dropping off the face of the Earth. Hunters were solitary enough that one could die without the community ever knowing exactly what had happened to him. It was a tough reality, but one that she'd learned to compartmentalize after awhile. 

"Are you sure about this?" Dean asked. "Seemed like you were building something good in Arizona." 

Jo did her best not to exhale in frustration. Instead, she fixed Dean with a weary look. 

"In spite of what you think, I am capable of making my own decisions. I'm sure." 

He at least had the decency to shoot her a regretful look, followed up by a self deprecating smile. 

"I just think that you could do better with your second shot than hanging around with bums like us." 

"Probably," Jo teased. She sighed and looked at Dean. "But I think you two need me. I know that you think you've changed. And you have, but you're still helping people. There are a lot of things that hunters could do if they've gone around the bend, but you haven't done those things. Everything you've been through, and you're still trying to make the world a better place in the best way you know." 

She took her beer and stood, because it was probably a little too much honesty to stick around without things being awkward. 

"And you know how you keep on the straight and narrow? You keep people around you who care. People who are willing to help you recover from whatever hell you've experienced. Literal and figurative, of course." 

She gave him a small smile and started toward the door. Behind her, she heard Dean get out of his chair and follow her. 

"Jo, wait." His hand caught hers and he whirled her around. She could see the confusion in his eyes, along with an intensity that took her breath away. 

For just a moment, Jo was sure that Dean was about to lean in and kiss her. And then someone cleared their throat. Both their heads turned in the direction of the sound. Cas stood there looking at both of them. 

"Dean, Jo," he nodded to each in turn and then shifted his gaze to Dean. "Dean, I need to talk to you." 

He didn't have to emphasize that he needed to talk to Dean alone. Jo got the hint just fine. She gave both a faint smile. 

"I was just on my way to do some reading in bed anyway," she lied. "You two catch up." 

'Catch up' might not be the right choice of words, since Cas had been mostly awol over the last few months when they really could have used him. Jo though that she saw a flicker of anger on Dean's face, which only reinforced her desire to give the two space to talk. With any luck, Cas at least came bearing some knowledge of what they were up against with the escapee from Purgatory. She hoped. 

She thought she saw a little note of appreciation in Dean's eyes as he caught her gaze on her way out. She tried not to think too hard about whatever Cas might have interrupted or if they'd come back to that at some point. Instead, she just slipped down the hallway to her room.


	10. Stay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The prodigal angel returns with a bit of good news/bad news.

As soon as Jo was out of earshot, Dean turned to look at Cas. 

"Cas, what the hell? I've been praying and calling for you. Where have you been?" 

It had been months, and no sign of Cas. Considering everything they'd been dealing with? Yeah, he was more than a little pissed at the radio silence. 

Cas looked remorseful, but Dean had seen that look on his face too many times lately. In some ways, amends had been made as they'd fought side by side in Purgatory. In others... Dean wasn't sure that their friendship would ever be the same. 

"That creature that escaped Purgatory with us is an omen of bad things to come. I've tried to find whatever I can on it. And-" Cas hesitated and didn't quite meet Dean's eyes. 

"And?" Dean prompted. "As much as I'd love to hash this out over tea, I don't think we have time for that. Not while that thing is carving people up." 

He knew that he was being a dick, but he also felt personally responsible for every single person that thing killed. The blood was on his hands because it wouldn't have escaped if it wasn't for Sam and Jo rescuing him from Purgatory. And maybe if he'd moved faster when Cas told them all that they needed to go, maybe the door would have closed behind them and nothing would have gotten out. All the same, his expression softened with a little note of apology as he ran his hand through his hair. 

"I also wanted to look into Jo. The means of her return..." the angel still avoided the hunter's eyes. "There's a darkness hanging onto her. She was forcibly removed from Heaven and I wanted to find out why." 

Dean didn't say anything right away. He realized that he was holding his breath in anticipation of Cas continuing that last line of thinking. When it seemed as though Cas were waiting for Dean to give an indication of which news he wanted first, Dean sighed and made his choice. 

"What did you find out about Jo?" 

Castiel avoided Dean's eyes for a moment before making eye contact. 

"Jo was ripped out of Heaven. Quite violently, if the trail left behind was any indication. There aren't many things that have the power to do that. They're called Fiends. Essentially, they have access to magic much more powerful than typical witches. There are only six in the world and they've never come together like this." 

Dean scowled, not wanting to think about what might have happened to Jo's soul upon removal from Heaven. There were some wounds that never healed. This also made it a lot easier to hate himself for being glad that she was back. 

"Why her?" 

The look on Castiel's face was hesitant, as if he were struggling with whether or not to answer. 

"I believe that they needed someone ripped from Heaven and someone rescued from Hell to start the process of breaking down the barriers that keep Purgatory separate from Earth. They knew that Jo was one of the most likely to help free you." 

Dean swore under his breath. 

"So the world's about to end and again it's my fault?" 

"No," Cas said. "This isn't a result of a choice you made." 

"Don't you dare blame Jo and Sam, Cas." Dean was a little too quick to reply, his tone a little too rough. Cas simply looked at him, his expression unapologetic. 

"We can discuss blame all we'd like, but it won't repair this situation." 

"Okay," Dean breathed out. "Any ideas on how to end these sons of bitches?" 

The angel nodded slowly. 

"There are rumors. Things that might work. But you should know-killing them might undo magic they've worked in the past." 

It didn't take long for Dean to connect the dots. When he did, he realized that he wished he hadn't. 

"You think that killing them might send Jo back?" 

"It might," Cas confirmed. "There's no conclusive evidence either way. This hasn't ever been done before." 

"God damnit," Dean muttered. He took a deep breath and then waved his hand. "Okay, we'll keep looking. See if we can find an alternative or..." he shrugged helplessly. He realized then that he didn't think he could handle losing Jo again. 

"Do you want me to tell her?" Cas asked. 

Dean shook his head. 

"No," he said strongly. "No, let me."

He turned toward the hallway and then sighed heavily and glanced over his shoulder. 

"Thanks, Cas. We'll figure it out." He might not have sounded too convinced, but at least they knew more than before. Even if it wasn't exactly good news. When was there ever good news, really? 

Dean headed towards his room, but stopped just outside the door that led to Jo's room. It was still weird to think that he could just go a few doors down to find her. She was here, and she was whole. Whatever Cas or anyone else had to say about it, he wasn't ready to let her go. Consequences be damned. After all, how many times had he and Sam cheated death? If anyone deserved that second chance, it was Jo. 

He stared at the door for a long time before he knocked. He wasn't sure what he was doing, but he had to see her. In fact, he didn't even know what he'd say to her. He wasn't ready to tell her about what he'd learned from Cas. Not yet. Maybe not ever. If there was a way to quietly deal with the whole thing, he'd find it. 

"Dean. Hey." There was a note of surprise in her voice as she moved aside and gestured for him to come in. Her voice still had that same soft lilt to it that he'd missed so much over the years. She looked the same-or rather, she looked better. The memories he'd had of her couldn't hold a candle to the real live woman in front of him. He didn't think that he deserved her faith, and he definitely didn't deserve the way that she was looking at him right now, but he also knew that he'd kick himself later if he kept pushing her away. 

He knew exactly what she'd do if she knew what Cas had told him. She'd march right to her potential second death with her head held high. Because it was the right thing to do. She'd face it down with the same fearlessness that she'd had when she placed herself between those hellhounds and himself. That was why she could do better than Dean. He knew it, but that didn't stop him from hoping that he could find a different way. It was easy to say to hell with the consequences if it meant that Jo got her second chance. 

He took a few steps towards her. There were things that he probably should be saying right now. Apologies to be made, maybe something to communicate what she meant to him. He'd never been all that great with talking about the heavy stuff. He simply reached out and pulled her into his arms as he bent his head down to meet her lips. There was a little murmur of surprise from her and then she melted into his arms and returned the kiss. Somewhere behind him, Jo managed to reach around and close her door before pulling him back into the room. He was done with keeping her at arm's length and done with ignoring this. Maybe he didn't want to waste any more time and maybe he was hoping that he'd give her a reason to stay. If he could just hold on tightly enough, maybe he could keep her this time.


	11. Back to Reality

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Most secrets don't stay that way for long around the Bunker.

Dean showed up at her door late in the night after Cas had interrupted... something, or more likely, nothing. And then his lips were on hers and Jo didn't give anything else much thought. There'd always been a light, flirty banter between the two and an air of some unresolved sexual tension. There'd always been something there, but this felt different. Things had changed between them. Part of it was that Dean himself had changed, and part of it was that she'd grown up a hell of a lot from her days as a hunting newbie who'd had a crush on someone who represented the life she'd always wanted.

She made sure the door was closed and pulled Dean back to her bed. She didn't want to risk him running away or overthinking things. She knew that he didn't think he deserved her-or anyone, really. She was just determined to change his mind about that.

After, she rested her head on Dean's bare chest and smiled. For the first time in as long as she could remember, she was content with every fiber of her being. It wouldn't last-it couldn't last-but she was going to enjoy the afterglow while she could.

"So that's what I turned down all those years ago?" she asked, tilting her head so she could smile up at him.

Dean grinned back, though she thought she could see a little hint of concern in his eyes. Something was troubling him, but that wasn't unusual. At the very least, he seemed determined to mask it.

"Yeah, well."

He looked both like he was ready to strut around and a little sheepish at the same time.

"I should have asked you sooner," he continued. "We never really found that right time, right place. You know?"

Jo sighed softly and nodded. "Yeah, I know."

She chewed that over as she closed her eyes and just listened to the drumbeat of his heart and felt his chest rise and fall. Her eyes opened again and she met his gaze.

"I turned you down that night because I didn't want to be the default choice on the night before a dangerous mission. Because, let's face it, I was the only woman even remotely in your age range within a five mile radius."

Dean grimaced, but she held up her hand to let her continue.

"And the thing about the right time, right place? We're hunters. There's never going to be a right time and right place. You don't wait for the right moment, you find the person who's willing to be in the foxhole with you."

Dean's hand found hers and gave it a squeeze.

"Yeah. I think I'm starting to see that."

There was something that flashed in his eyes then, though she couldn't quite put her finger on it. Sadness, regret, guilt, or something else along those lines as his eyes studied every inch of her face.

"About that proposition back at Bobby's-I'm sorry about it. You deserved better. Always did."

Jo pushed herself up long enough to give him a quick kiss.

"You'll just have to find ways to make it up to me," she said lightly, still smiling.

Dean chuckled and pulled her closer to deepen the kiss.

"Just name it."

\----

It was awhile before Jo emerged from her room. After a little more time spent making up for not finding the 'right time, right place' before now, Dean had fallen asleep. She'd been close to drifting off until it hit her how hungry she was. They'd burned quite a few calories over the last few hours after all. She made her way to the kitchen with a smile still on her face.

She wasn't expecting to see Cas still hanging out in the library. He looked at her in surprise. 

"I take it that Dean's had the chance to talk to you about the Fiends." 

The smile faded from Jo's face as she looked the angel over. She supposed that she needed to come back to reality sometime. One night's worth of bliss didn't wipe out the world going crazy or even the things out there that needed to be put in the ground. 

"No," she said flatly. "He didn't." 

Cas frowned in confusion and looked in the direction of the sleeping quarters. "But I was sure that I saw him go to your room. He said he was going to talk to you. I assumed..."

If she wasn't so busy wondering what Dean had neglected to tell her and why, Jo might have laughed at Castiel's cluelessness in this situation. She supposed that she'd never really wondered all that much about angels and sexuality, nor did she think she needed to know. As it was, she wasn't going to be the one to explain exactly what Dean had been doing in her room for the last few hours. 

"Cas, we don't have all the time in the world here. Why don't you just tell me what you told Dean?"

Castiel frowned, but shook his head. 

"Dean wanted to tell you himself. I promised I'd let him." 

"Yeah? So it's something that can wait for Dean to make time to talk to me? It's not that crucial that I know right now?" 

She was pushing and she knew that it was unfair to the angel, but she still wasn't sure if Dean was ready to include her on everything. And with the world hanging by a thread, she couldn't afford to sit on the sidelines. 

Cas hesitated again but finally started to explain. Jo listened as he repeated what he'd told Dean about the fiends, and about the risks associated with ending them. She was silent for a few minutes after he finished. She looked down the hallway, thinking of the man who was currently asleep in her bed. It would be so much easier to turn her back on this and slide under the covers with him and hope that they figured something else out. But if the Fiends had set everything in motion to take down the barrier protecting Earth from Purgatory, they needed to be stopped. It was her risk to take, no matter what Dean might think. She certainly didn't want Dean to have to be the one to make that decision. He didn't need yet another of her deaths on his conscience. 

She squared her shoulders and looked Castiel in the eye. 

"Well, we won't know how this is all going to work until we try. Are you ready to go?"

"Now? Shouldn't we wait for Dean?"

Jo shook her head. 

"No. Cas, you know that Dean is going to try to find a different way and from the looks of things, we don't have time for that. If we go and I fail, then Dean and Sam will just have to come up with a Plan B." 

When he still seemed to hesitate, Jo fixed him with a glare that might have made her momma proud. 

"Cas, this is my choice to make. Some things are worth risking your life for. You and I both know that." 

The angel finally nodded and reached his hand out to rest on her shoulder, spiriting her away from the bunker and off to an uncertain future.


	12. Back to You

Dean woke up to an empty bed. Funny thing, he was usually the one to do the leaving in the morning. Only this time, he wasn't going anywhere. He was holding on as long as she'd let him.

He searched the bunker for Jo, his panic rising as there was no sign of her anywhere. He finally took to just shouting for both Jo and Cas. Neither answered. Though eventually, Sam emerged from the library, bleary-eyed and carrying a book.

"Dean? What's going on?"

Dean looked at his brother, feeling a little rush of relief that Sam was still here, but still trying to keep the panic at bay. Cas had promised that he'd let Dean talk to Jo, but... where was the angel? And where was Jo? Dean wouldn't put it past her to get the truth out of him. After all, Jo was good at getting answers out of people when she needed to. It was part of what made her such a good hunter. And part of what made her able to see through his own bullshit.

"Jo and Cas are missing." Dean rubbed at his forehead, trying to stave off the headache that was setting in. "Sam, Cas told me that these bastards called Fiends brought her back. They wanted you two to rescue me from Purgatory. Something about someone who came back from Heaven and someone who came back from Hell using their blood to get someone out of Purgatory. The creature it freed is going to allow them to rain down shit on us."

Sam's expression tightened. Dean could see the guilt squirming around on his face, even if the brothers wouldn't talk about it. They'd both done some pretty screwed up things to keep each other alive or bring each other back to life. And while Dean carried his own guilt over those actions, it was better when they just didn't talk about it. Instead, they just kept on going. Kept on hunting things, saving people, trying to continue the family business. Even as that 'business' had morphed into something much more than they could ever have expected.

Sam sighed and held out the book in his hands to Dean.

"We stop the creature, we stop their planned apocalypse. Seems like your blood might lure it in and we can trap it in the circle in the illustration and destroy it."

Dean nodded gravely.

"Let's set it up. I'll do what I can to get Cas and Jo back here."

Dean went to work in a field near the bunker, drawing out the intricate design meant to trap the creature while Sam hunted down ingredients. As Dean drew, he muttered a prayer to Cas.

"Cas, you get your ass back here or you and me are done. You hear me? Sam found something that we can work with."

He tried not to run through all the possibilities. He didn't know how long they'd been gone-what if Jo was already... No. He couldn't let his mind go down that road. He had to just keep trying to make contact.

It wasn't until Sam had returned and set fire to the sage and mallowsweet that would help lure the creature into the circle. Dean slit his arm and squeezed a few drops of blood over the fire. Cas and Jo appeared just outside the circle and the angel's face was filled with concern while Jo looked a hell of a lot like her mother did right before she hollered at someone and put the fear of God into them.

Dean held up a hand and shook his head to stave off any discussion. But none of them had the chance to respond before they heard the flapping of wings and a literal nightmare appeared in front of them. Dean took a few large steps back out of the circle as the thing followed him. After, he wouldn't have been able to describe concrete features beyond the black spectral wings. It didn't belong in this world and his eyes seemed to recognize that. Looking directly at it inspired the kind of terror that was usually reserved for his worst nightmares and flashbacks of his time in Hell.

He shuddered and took a place beside Sam as the beast paused and let out an inhuman shriek once it realized that it was trapped. Then there was a flurry of activity as the wings beat hard against the constraints.

Sam held out the book for Dean to look over his shoulder and they both began the incantation meant to banish the monster back to Purgatory. He could feel the pull of Purgatory as the words gained momentum and tore at the border between this world and the next. He felt Sam put a hand on his shoulder and was grateful for the grounding touch.

In a flash of light and smoke that smelled suspiciously like sulfur, the creature disappeared from the circle and was sucked back into the realm where it belonged. A faint scent of burning remained as the markings of the circle started to deteriorate.

Dean took a moment to catch his breath and didn't look at Jo or Cas until the angel spoke up.

"Dean-"

He looked up and shook his head at the angel.

"Don't. Just don't. Not now, Cas."

He turned and stormed back towards the bunker. Even if they weren't near enough to hear him, it felt good to slam the door as he went inside. . 


	13. A New Beginning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It would seem that everyone has something to talk about.

Jo watched as Dean stormed off and then turned her attention to Sam. Sam shrugged apologetically.

"Sam. Jo and I were close to locating the Fiends. Now that their creature is dead, they'll scatter."

Sam glared at Cas and Jo intermittently.

"How long do you think it will be before another human ends up in Purgatory? What are the odds that they get a chance to try again, Cas?"

Castiel frowned and looked about to answer when Sam shook his head.

"Rhetorical question. I'm not saying it's impossible, but the circumstances that landed Dean there were pretty damn specific."

Castiel still looked ready to argue, and Jo was right on his heels. Granted, she was this close to taking off after Dean too.

"We'll keep an eye on the situation, Cas. At the first sign of any sort of activity from them, we'll do what we can. But don't... don't ask Dean to lose anyone else," he glanced at Jo and she couldn't help but avert her gaze. Her own anger at Dean taking control started to die out.

Castiel looked at Jo as well and then back to Sam.

"Okay. I'll see what I can do to secure Heaven against them trying to remove someone again."

"You do that, Cas. And Cas? Thanks for coming back."

Jo looked up again to see Sam clap Castiel on the shoulder. The angel nodded tersely and then disappeared. She blinked and tried to fend off the surprise and awe that came with seeing that sort of otherworldly exit. She might have just traveled that way with him, but it didn't stop her mind from rebelling at the very possibility of it all.

With Cas gone, Sam fixed his gaze on her and crossed his arms.

"In this family, we make a lot of questionable choices to keep each other alive. I'm not saying that it's always right, but we're all we have-us and Cas. And you're just going to have to get used to that. The chance that people could die down the road because we didn't let you kill the Fiends is going to weigh on us both. But Dean and I are willing to bear that guilt if it means that you're alive. We do the best we can for this world, but this family comes first. It has to."

There was a quiet desperation in Sam's eyes that tugged at Jo's heart. Being a hunter meant losing people. Many came into the business because a loved one had died violently, and staying in the business meant watching your friends and family die. She knew that as well as anyone these days. A lot of hunters just shut themselves off from everyone. Don't get too close, don't get hurt. Some just went crazy because of it. And some hung on with every fiber of their being.

It took a moment longer before she realized that Sam was including her in their family. She swallowed a lump in her throat and took a few steps closer to wrap her arms around him in a hug. Knowing that the Fiends were still out there was going to keep her up at night, but she supposed it was just one of many things that would make it hard to rest easy. Hunting had never been as black and white as she'd imagined it to be.

"I'm going to go talk to Dean," she said as she pulled away from the hug.

Sam gave her a small smile.

"I think I'll make a supply run. We're getting low on milk."

Jo gave Sam a grateful half-smile and then turned to head towards the bunker.

She found Dean sitting at the kitchen table with two glasses of whiskey in front of him. He looked up at her and nudged the second glass her way.

"Go ahead and let me have it," he told her.

There was just the faintest hint of defiance in his expression, even as she noted how weary he looked.

She sighed and shook her head. She moved over to where he sat and bent down to kiss him. He shifted in his seat, seemingly surprised at the kiss. But it didn't take long for him to wrap his arms around her and pull her into his lap. She didn't mind. Instead, she curled against him and continued to kiss back, matching the heat radiating off him. His fingers tangled in her hair as his other arm held her close, as if he were afraid to let go.

She didn't know how much time passed before Dean's grip around her loosened slightly and he moved away from her lips.

"As much as I hate to ruin what we're working on here, we should probably talk about how this is going to work," he said.

Jo looked at Dean, a faint smirk crossing her lips.

"Yeah, I know. Who said that?" he joked. "Just... let's get this out of the way."

She slid off his lap and took the seat across from him. She waited for him to start talking while she picked up the drink that had been forgotten.

"I was sure that you were going to come in here, pissed as hell that I went over your head and made a decision without you." He gripped his glass, but didn't pick it up. "Thing is, Jo, you ran off without even telling me." He put his hand up as if to forestall any arguments. "Yeah, yeah. Pot, kettle. I know. But maybe, just maybe, we try to be in the foxhole together next time."

She was half considering pointing out that he'd also chosen not to tell her something when he beat her to the punch with the whole 'pot, kettle' comment. And using her own words hit home. She reached across the table and covered his hand with hers.

"I think I can live with that."

The relief on Dean's face was palpable. He threw her that heart-melting grin of his. "Good. I mean, you know we're both probably going to screw up at some point, but we can try, right?"

This was more than just a man looking for some comfort on what might be their last night on Earth. It struck her that Dean _had_ changed. Though she suspected that he'd just scraped off some of the layers of armor that he'd kept around himself to avoid being hurt.

"We can try," she agreed.

He took a long drink from his whiskey, as if steeling himself to say something more.

"Jo, I can live with you deciding that you don't want this. But I don't know if I could live with myself if something happened to you and I could prevent it. Knowing that you're alive and well out there somewhere is all I need."

"All you need?" Jo asked, quirking an eyebrow.

Dean smiled again and tugged at her hand.

"Well, maybe I need you to come back over here and pick up where we left off."

Jo laughed and obliged without hesitation. She knew that this wasn't a 'happily ever after' or even the right place and time necessarily. Hunters didn't get happily ever afters. But this was a new beginning, and those were just rare enough that she knew she had to grab onto this and savor it.

By how tightly Dean held onto her as she settled into his lap, she was pretty sure that he felt the same.


End file.
